Notice a moment when you’re agitated that someone else is acting . . . different. (You won’t have to look far. Often, you may notice an accompanying thought that goes something like, “They should . . . .” Or, you may think something like, “I should . . . .”
You could also be alert for the inverse: when you try to be like — or different from — someone else.
You’re comparing. Don’t shame yourself: just notice the thought, like a pencil on the kitchen counter.
Now, consider the possibility that you might accept Two different actions. Notice how that feels.